Life sometimes has problems.
How I look at those difficulties,
and what I tell myself about them,
and how I choose to deal with them,
makes a great deal of difference
in my mood and in the quality of my life.

For the past four weeks I have been recovering
from two broken bones that connect my arm to my wrist.
Because I am over 60 years old, recovery might be a bit slow.
So patience is necessary.

 My arm hurts, and I am unable to tolerate pain medication.
There are a great many things that are difficult to do with one hand,
and many more things that are impossible.
Therefore my normal activities are greatly restricted.

For example, yesterday morning I decided I wanted to cook dinner.
I chose my easy recipe for Mild Chili Beans
which is posted here at DietHobby under RECIPES, Mealtime.

It takes at least twice as much effort to do everything.
I got hamburger meat from the freezer,
a can of tomatoes, a can of kidney beans,
and seasoning mix from the pantry.

When I got out the raw onion, it then occurred to me that
I would be unable to peel, slice, and chop it.
Then I realized that I also couldn’t open the cans,
or access the pot that I use to cook this recipe.

These inconveniences were relatively minor and merely temporary,
but they interfered with my immediate plans, and I’m not fond of that.
I felt the emotions that are common to us all in such situations.
 So what to do?

I could give in to those negative emotions
…and wallow in them for awhile…,
or I could choose to deliberately focus my mind
on the positives of my life that still exist in my current situation
in a purposeful attempt to give myself a better day.
I have learned from my own experience
that this choice is what determines the quality of my life.

I began calling to mind all of the things I have to feel grateful for,
and all of the things that I can still immediately do.
This did make me feel better,
and soon a solution presented itself to me.
I decided to ask my husband to cut up the onion,
to open the cans, and to get out the pan.
He did those things for me when he got home from work,
and I was able to cook dinner.

This is a small example of a big principle,
and I’ve found that it applies to every situation in my life.

Forgiving ourselves isn’t about forgetting.
It’s about not bringing the offense up to ourselves in negative ways.
Forgiving ourselves is simply letting go
of what we are holding against ourselves
so that we can move on.
It’s important to learn from mistakes.
What good are mistakes if we don’t learn from them?
They are bound to come up again if we don’t correct the problem the first time.
There are some things that are hard to grasp the first time around
and we may not even realize that it is a problem,
but if it comes around over and over again
we should recognize that something is probably wrong somewhere.
Learning and growing is a never-ending process,
so we need to get a clue as soon as possible and save ourselves a lot of aggravation. 

Even though we make mistakes,
It’s important not be too hard on ourselves.
Being human means that we won’t be perfect
….so accept it and move on.
This will make us happier and give our self-esteem a positive break.

  We need to forgive ourselves.
It is okay to ask God and/or others to forgive us,
but it is also important that we forgive ourselves.
Forgiving ourselves gives us freedom from guilt and pain
and it helps us move on with life in a positive way.
Each of us can be our own worst enemy so we need to forgive ourselves
and choose to be happy with our decisions and the rest of our lives.

Each of us needs to follow our own path.
There is a certain path that everyone must take for himself or herself.
Following someone else’s path for our lives can lead us
down a long road full of sorrows.

  I pray for guidance in finding my own path
and believe that my Higher Power is directing me.
When we find ourselves taking a detour,
we need to have the courage to stop, turn around,
and get back on our own true path.

Forgiving ourselves doesn’t let us off the hook,
it doesn’t justify what we have done,
and it isn’t a sign of weakness.
Forgiveness is a choice that takes courage and strength,
and it gives us the opportunity to become an overcomer
rather than remaining a victim of our own scorn.

We all make mistakes.
It is simply a part of every life.
This lifestyle change that we are involved in is not easy.
Anything of real value never is.

Success requires hard work, dedication and sacrifice.
It's a lot more than counting calories, fat or carbs.
It means there are days you look in the mirror
and you tell yourself that unless you alter some of your behavior,
you are not going to be the success you hope to be.

 I know, I am there. I am learning,
I am moving forward, even on the days that I feel like giving up.

We live in a world that suggests "magic" and "easy" at every twist and turn.
We have come to believe that if we simply buy a potion or pill,
subscribe to a web-site and buy a video, health and happiness instantly occurs.
But truly, it's very hard work and sometimes it’s hard work I don't enjoy.

A half-cup of plain 0% Fage yogurt
gets me to my goal quicker than several cookies,
but I don't always want the yogurt.
I have to talk myself out of poor choices daily.
But when I make the right choice
I am acknowledging that my goals have value.

I deserve success just as much as anyone else does.
I have to work for it, sacrifice for it.
We are not called to be perfect;
we are called to put forth our best effort every day.
It's not always glamorous.
Most days it's putting one foot in front of the other
and walking the walk.

Here are 4 Core Elements to consider when Setting Goals:

Make sure your goals stand up to the following tests:

Are they realistic, specific and measurable,
and do you have a back-up plan
for when things don't go as expected?

Realistic

The goals you set have to be real in the context of your life.
They cannot be based on some ideal version of your real situation
and more importantly don't base them on some change you are ‘going' to make
that will give you more time. Set your first goals according to what your life looks like right now!
Look for changes that you can insert into your current schedule.
If you are too busy to cook--then don't plan to cook at home every day.
Start by finding healthy calorie controlled prepared foods that don't take a lot of time to prepare.

Specific

Make each goal very specific.
Make sure that both the steps to achieving it and that the results are readily observable
so there is no guesswork or grey in your ability to know what to do.

As an exanple: “Today I will weigh and measure the kind and amounts of food I eat
and immediately enter every bit of it into my computer food journal.”

Measurable

In the example I just gave.
it is easy to measure the extent to which you completed the goal. 

Back-Up Plan

Once you have set out some realistic, specific and measurable goals
you need to set up a second set that mirror these goals but are a little more forgiving.
These are useful when the unexpected happens.

So for example, sometimes the unexpected occurs.
For these occasions, instead of doing nothing
(which feels like failure and can trigger a bigger slide)
simply carefully note the kind and amounts of food eaten,
jot that estimated information down and then enter it in your computer food journal later.

While this is less than ideal it IS still part of "the plan" and thus will have you feeling
psychologically that you succeeded whereas skipping altogether would feel like failure.

During my endless search for the Positive,
it recently occurred to me ...

One great thing about using a computer software
food journal similar to DietPower is
that even if one didn't want to count calories or control portions,

...someday in the future, you could still be able to look back
at your personal data, and learn your accurate food amounts,
nutritional values and/or your eating patterns.

I have been making daily food entries into my DietPower journal for the past 6 years,
and I can access any day's food information from the past 6 years.

For Example, suppose I wanted to know exactly what and how much I ate
every Christmas Day or every Birthday or every Vacation for the past 6 years,
I can pull that data up and compare it.

I find this ability to access personal information to be very compelling.