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Mutually Exclusive Goals - POSTED ON: Sep 06, 2011
Sometimes the things we want are mutually-exclusive. Here is a common statement made by dieters:
“I am excited about dropping my extra fat, and I want to stop dieting and obsessing over every bite. I think about food and weight loss all the time. I want to just be free of that and eat normally.”
The….draw….of many diets is the desire for two distinctly separate things,
* to lose and maintain weight. * to be able to eat “normally” without having to think about it.
These are two separate goals, and for almost every obese or reduced obese person, these goals are Mutually-Exclusive. Meaning that if you have the one, you can’t have the other. You can’t have them both at the same time.
These conflicting desires are exploited by modern marketing which promises us that we can have both of these things together, but it’s a false promise, an insidious lie that raises unreasonable expectations and tends to doom us to failure.
Many people spend their lives trying to force that square peg into a round hole, refusing to ACCEPT that universal truth.
In our current modern society, difficult day-to-day food choices which require thought and self-discipline, will always be an ongoing part of one’s way-of-life in order for an obese person to become normal weight, and for a reduced obese person to remain normal weight. We will never be able to automatically eat like a "normal" person. While we can develop positive habits that will help us in that task. Developing habits takes a great deal of effort, and although, after these habits are established, certain habits might help reduce a few of our conscious food choices, it won't resolve the problem. Specific eating Habits might make some eating choices easier, but it won't eliminate the continual thinking and choosing process.
That dieting Truth doesn’t have to be a negative. Make it a positive. Dieting can become an enjoyable Hobby.
For those interested in following my Diet Recipe videos, I recently posted a new one: "Crispy White Pizza", which is located here at DietHobby under Recipes, Mini-Meals.
Labor Day Weekend - POSTED ON: Sep 03, 2011
I will be off-line during this Holiday weekend. Those of you who would like immediate inspiration can find it here in the Archives, which holds seven months of daily posts. Or you could take this time to review the rest of this site. For those who are following my “Ask Grandma” videos click to see my latest one: “Kpop Music? Still like that old time Rock 'n Roll” which is located in DietHobby under RESOURCES, Videos, Ask Grandma.
Forget Your Diet? - POSTED ON: Sep 02, 2011
It’s Friday, and today is the start of Labor Day Weekend. It is common for dieters to lose focus around special events, like holidays and vacations.
Think about what happens to us at Thanksgiving, Halloween, or Christmas when we tend to “forget” to pay close attention to our food intake.
Imagine you are a (good) parent shopping at the mall with your two pre-school children. You wouldn’t get so preoccupied that you forgot that you brought your kids along. Instead, you’d always know where your children were and what they were doing.
Most parents have the mental ability to stay alert, even after the kids are in bed. This built-in awareness, or focus, helps them know when their children are at risk. Sometimes we don’t set out to overeat or ignore our diets, we simply lose our focus – the ability to stay aware of our eating plan while we enjoy our food together with conversation and special activities.
We can have fun and still Focus. We need a way to hold continual awareness in spite of what’s going on around us. It’s tough, but it can be done.
Part of staying focused is:
Remember: Frequently remind ourselves about our food-plan and goals. Pull Focus back quickly: When slipping into old patterns, intentionally renew focus. Stay Alert: Mentally identify our individual emotions in the situation.
It is important that we don’t “forget” about our weight-loss or maintenance efforts, so we need to develop a built-in awareness to help us stay focused on what it takes to live with the weight we want.
Choices and Responsibility - POSTED ON: Sep 01, 2011
There are many different food plans,and many ways to look at eating. All of them work for someone, but none of them work for everyone.
The following quote is from a member of a forum I frequently visit. The principle discussed is the matter of choice and responsibility for that choice,which actually fits into many different food-plans, however. in the present quote, the principle is being applied to “S” days in the No S Diet.
“Something I want to mention is out of the books Beating Overeating and Overcoming Overeating by Gillian Riley. She says to give yourself Complete freedom (seriously) and tell yourself you CAN do whatever you want. Then ask yourself, I am I really Choosing?? This has really freed me in the past eating changes. I ask myself, What do I really want, do I want to go ahead and eat/overeat, and then imagine the outcomes of both choices the negative and positive, how I will feel, ect. if I choose one or the other. Then I can decide what I TRULY want to do, whether its negative or positive, and I also have to ACCEPT the consequences ect. So in doing it this way I am taking responsibility for my choices. Instead of just binging a whole bunch and beating myself up afterwards, If I think it over and imagine how I'll feel later and what might be the consequences of doing it, I didn’t always want to overeat/binge! In fact, a lot of times, I chose NOT to do the negative thing! I can ask myself what I REALLY want (quality vs. quantity) and then eat accordingly. If I REALLY want to binge, I can binge, but then accept the consequences with no problems. If I REALLY want to enjoy a few treats without going overboard, then I could choose that too. I think If I truly ask myself I could be more true to myself and my true desires. It is a powerful tool, with also allowing yourself complete freedom!”
“Something I want to mention is out of the books Beating Overeating and Overcoming Overeating by Gillian Riley. She says to give yourself Complete freedom (seriously) and tell yourself you CAN do whatever you want. Then ask yourself, I am I really Choosing?? This has really freed me in the past eating changes.
I ask myself, What do I really want, do I want to go ahead and eat/overeat, and then imagine the outcomes of both choices the negative and positive, how I will feel, ect. if I choose one or the other.
Then I can decide what I TRULY want to do, whether its negative or positive, and I also have to ACCEPT the consequences ect. So in doing it this way I am taking responsibility for my choices.
Instead of just binging a whole bunch and beating myself up afterwards, If I think it over and imagine how I'll feel later and what might be the consequences of doing it, I didn’t always want to overeat/binge! In fact, a lot of times, I chose NOT to do the negative thing!
I can ask myself what I REALLY want (quality vs. quantity) and then eat accordingly. If I REALLY want to binge, I can binge, but then accept the consequences with no problems. If I REALLY want to enjoy a few treats without going overboard, then I could choose that too.
I think If I truly ask myself I could be more true to myself and my true desires. It is a powerful tool, with also allowing yourself complete freedom!”
This is a principle of mental control, and seems completely reasonable.
The elephant in the room here though, is the possible chemical effects of highly altered foods on the body, and their attraction and availability in our current world.
And ….if…. these modern (non) foods with combinations of salt/fat/sugars and man-made chemicals that help with flavor and shelf-life, actually affect an individual body the way alcohol affects an alcoholic… making it almost impossible for some bodies to establish ongoing mental control after any of that substance enters the body.
I don’t know. But when bingeing is a personal problem, it seems like this might be an issue to consider.
Slipping in Maintenance - POSTED ON: Aug 31, 2011
Avoidance of regaining lost weightis the primary goal of weight-maintenance.
Recently on a forum I frequently visit I read a post by a person who is working to maintain her weight-loss. She had gained 5 lbs over time, and said:
“I can’t believe I let myself slip”
I considered that statement and compared it with my own experience. Over the past three years, my body has added about 5 - 7 lbs to its stabilized weight.
All the while, I’ve been working hard to keep that from happening, and I’m still working to lose that regain and to avoid gaining more.
In my own case, I wouldn’t call it “slipping”. I didn’t “slip”. It’s more like my body was being pulled along a surface by an unknown force, while I was desperately working to cling, grasp, clutch, and hold on to any surface that would stabilize me and keep me from moving.
This process is still going on. Every day I work to keep my body at its “normal” weight, here in my maintenance weight range near the 115 lb area,even though my body thinks “normal” is over 200 lbs, and seems to inch my weight higher despite all my best efforts to keep this from happening.
Based on my past experience, I am well aware that if I chose to stop continually and consistently working to maintain my current weight, it wouldn’t be like missing my step and falling off a curb to land on a nearby surface. It would be more like jumping out of a plane without a parachute, my body rapidly hurling a long distance toward my potential destruction.
I’ve now been maintaining near my goal weight for 5 years and 7 months, and it takes more work to do it now than it did the first two years. It’s not surprising to me that less than 5% maintain their weight-loss, what surprises me is that the percentages are that high.
Some might think that this article is negative thinking,but I believe that Acceptance of Reality is a positive and helpful thing. I am grateful that I was able to reach my weight goal,and I am grateful for every day that my body stays near it. The Reduced Obese are constantly being lied to by the media, and marketing interests...including the medical profession, which serves to instill false expectations. Weight loss is not easy, and long-term Maintenance is even harder. It is a mistake to believe that maintaining a weight loss is easy, and that someday in our lifetime we can do it without a struggle.
We need to get over it. It ain’t happening.
Mar 01, 2021 DietHobby: A Digital Scrapbook. 2000+ Blogs and 500+ Videos in DietHobby reflect my personal experience in weight-loss and maintenance. One-size-doesn't-fit-all, and I address many ways-of-eating whenever they become interesting or applicable to me.
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