Many Common Phrases Just Aren't True
- POSTED ON: Feb 12, 2016



Just because we hear something said a lot, or our parents said it, or we see it in ads…doesn’t make it true.

1. Nothing tastes as good as thin feels.
......Truth: A lot of things taste better than being thin feels.

2. Cheaters never prosper.
.......Truth: “the rain falls on the just and the unjust fella—but mostly on the just, for the unjust have got the just’s umbrella.”

3. The customer is always right.
.......Truth: Most of the times, customers are just crazy. And some businesses do good business because they have a healthy sense of self, and don’t bend to complaints. “In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock.” ~ Thomas Jefferson

4. “No offense, but…” [Followed by an offensive statement]

5. “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”
.......Truth: Often, it makes you considerably weaker

6. “Nothing is impossible.”

7. “It all happens for a reason.”
.......Truth: No, it doesn’t. Tragedy befalls the innocent, and luck attaches itself to the privileged. Karma is not what we think it is…it’s interdependence, not justice. If there is a reason, usually that reason is rooted in our passion, aggression, or ignorance. Or, physics. Not the stars.

8. “God never gives you more than you can bear.”

9. “Money can’t buy happiness.”
.......Truth: studies have shown this to be true for the rich, but the differences between poor and middle class have a significant effect on happiness.

10. “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.”
.......Truth: Anyone who’s ever been on the receiving end of a rude, anonymous internet comment knows this one is a half-truth. “Psychological abuse can cause more damage than just about anything else, and you can’t just heal up and move on like you can with physical injuries.”

11. “We only use 10% of our brain.”
.......Truth: No, we don’t.

12. Natural.


Why I Don't Wear Makeup
- POSTED ON: Feb 11, 2016

                                      

I very much like and agree with the concepts contained in the article  below:

Why I Don’t Wear Makeup
 …. Excerpts from an article
by Aabye-Gayle Fracis-Favilla

Our culture is subtly (and not so subtly) waging war against the body — a result of an unhealthy obsession with youth and perfection. We tell women that they’re beautiful and that they should love themselves. We tell little girls to have self-confidence and that they can be anything they want to be.

But then, and often with the same breath, we suggest they can be beautiful (or confident) only when they are not quite themselves. We sell women (both young and old) products to “fix” or “improve” their appearance — wrinkle removers, concealers, eyelash enhancers, and other colorful cover-ups.

The young want to look mature. The mature want to look young. No one really wants to look like herself. Everyone wants to look unflawed. Feminine façades have become the norm — what’s expected. Maybe you’re born with it. Maybe you bought it (or had your plastic surgeon inject it).

I want to avoid falling prey to a self-erasing mentality when I look at myself in the mirror.

Bodies are imperfect and asymmetrical. Bodies come in a myriad of sizes, shapes and colors. Bodies grow older. I don’t want to view aging as an adversary, which I have to fight or the imperfections of my face and form as mistakes I have to hide. That’s not a safe approach to loving myself well.

I wish I could rid our culture of cosmetic dependence. I wish I lived in a world where every woman was encouraged to be satisfied with her face instead of bombarded by messages offering ways to improve it or cover over it. I wish the majority of our society viewed makeup as an optional accessory as opposed to the required response to any perceived deficiency.

I have enough insecurity that I’m working on. I don’t want to buy or apply more at the cosmetics counter.
So I’ve made up my mind about makeup. At least for now, I’m not wearing it.

I don’t mean for this to be a battle cry. I don’t presume to speak for all women. If I’m going to be a woman capable of self-confidence and self-love, then I can’t allow my face to feel like a façade.

My hope is that all people will love their appearance, that wearing makeup (or dyeing one’s hair) won’t be compulsory, but something each person feels free to choose or refuse.


Just One Bite
- POSTED ON: Feb 10, 2016


Walking Away
- POSTED ON: Feb 09, 2016


   


All too often, the idea of  “walking away” is treated as the worst thing ever. Giving up on something is made out to be a a tragedy, a weakness and a character flaw… when sometimes it’s the very best thing you can do for yourself.

Giving up is often treated as a negative – the phrase itself has connotations of failure and weakness – when in reality, a willingness to walk away from something is actually an expression of strength and control.

When we find ourselves in a negative situation, the ability to change it by leaving is the ultimate expression of power.

Many of the situations in which we find ourselves only control us because we give our consent…  and then we seem to forget that we have the power to leave that situation.

Many people have felt trapped; because they view the idea of “leaving” as an admission of failure. To walk away is to “give up”, to reveal that you are somehow a lesser person for being unable to endure your situation with stoic resolve… or worse,... being unable to make it better.

Giving up and moving on gets framed as a tacit admission of guilt; it’s your fault that things went so badly and now you’re trying to run away from the consequences of your decisions instead of facing them like a grown-up.

But what is there to be gained from “winning” an interaction?  Giving up and moving on isn’t an admission of defeat, it’s about NOT playing the game in the first place.

When you’re working to improve yourself there are times when you will come to the crossroads where you have to decide whether or not you are willing to choose to change who you are as a person.

It is hard learning how to give up and let go of dreams and goals –And yet, it can also be liberating. 

Viewing giving up on goals – even ones that are clearly not working – as an admission of failure leads to devoting time and mental energy on things that cause us pain and get us nowhere. 

We believe that giving up – letting go of dreams and long-held goals – is something to be mourned and avoided. But often it’s a matter of understanding the truth.

Keep in mind: being willing to give up isn’t a “get out of responsibilities free” card – it’s not something that you pull out when things have gotten to the point where you don’t feel like dealing with them any more.

The point of being willing to walk away is that you are willing to accept the consequences of leaving – because you feel that it’s better than the alternative.

By being willing to let go, you are proving yourself to be strong and powerful. It’s saying that you value yourself and your boundaries more than some nebulous fear.

It’s saying that you’re brave enough and strong enough to take your chances, rather than stay in a specific situation any longer.  You are explicitly demonstrating that you have the confidence and the courage to do what’s right for you.

You’re not giving up. You’re choosing to leave on your own terms.


Stuck in the Middle
- POSTED ON: Feb 08, 2016


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